I am not having a good day today, at least physically. I have been having a lot of pain in my legs lately, and this morning I was in tears trying to push down the pain. When that's added to the fact that I have been taking the maximum amount I can of nausea meds and am still being sick, it's a recipe for disaster. I've figured out that it's now been a year of struggling with intense nausea and vomiting. Everyday for 365 days I have thrown up. It's getting to the point where I don't even remember the times that I don't have nausea. It's just one of those symptoms that goes along with having the Crohn's in the part of the stomach and intestine that set up the perfect conditions for it to be a problem. I've tried ginger, tea, acid blockers, meditation, Gravol, Zofran and now Ativan but even that is starting to lose it's effectiveness. I just want to feel better.
Today I accept that I have limitations. I forgive myself for not being able to do more, for not being able to do what I want, but I also know that tomorrow is a new chance for things to change. Tomorrow I might feel stronger. Tomorrow I might just feel a bit better.